No mud, no lotus
We’ve all been through bad things in life. And when they happen we think, why? Why is this happening to me. When will I feel better? We beat ourselves up over these misfortunes. We blame ourselves and we obsessively look for answers.
Like anyone else, I’ve had some bad stuff happen to me in my 27 years on this planet. I looked everywhere for answers to try and understand why these things had happened to me, but no one could give me a plausible answer and no one could seem to relate or understand my pain.
However, Buddhist teachings on suffering or more specifically transforming suffering, were literally and figuratively a life saver for me.
Thich Nhat Hanh’s No Mud, No Lotus is one such book that illuminated so many things for me about my suffering. According to Buddhism, suffering is one of the Noble Truths of our existence. Suffering is an inevitable part of our lives. However, without suffering we cannot know happiness. The key lies in transforming suffering so we can realise happiness and help ourselves heal, grow and progress down the spiritual path.
I won’t spend time analysing No Mud, No Lotus, but will share just a couple of some of the most powerful passages from the book which really transformed my thinking around suffering and why, to be blunt, crap things happen in life and how we can grow from this and realise happiness.
“…Without mud, you cannot have a lotus flower. Without suffering, you have no ways in order to learn how to be understanding and compassionate…. Happiness is the lotus flower, and the suffering is the mud. So the practice is how to make use of the suffering, make use of the mud, to create the flower, the happiness, and this is possible.”
Translation: Lotus flowers are beautiful, but they grow in mud. In fact they thrive in it. The mud, suffering, is needed so the lotus can grow and flower. And through this we can learn a lot.
The work of mindfulness is first to recognize the suffering and second to embrace it. A mother taking care of a crying baby naturally will take the child into her arms without suppressing, judging it, or ignoring the crying. Mindfulness is like that mother, recognizing and embracing suffering without judgment. So the practice is not to fight or suppress the feeling, but rather to cradle it with a lot of tenderness
Translation: When suffering and pain happens, acknowledge it. In our society, we feel like we need to immediately put a bandaid over our scars. We need to get over it now. However,during times of pain and suffering we are given a unique opportunity to be present in the moment with our raw emotions. In these times, we need to remember to be gentle and take care of ourselves. Don’t judge yourself or be your own harshest critic for feeling hurt or not “getting over” it quick enough. Just be an observer of your emotions and acknowledge them, whether good or bad. Nurture yourself and give yourself room to feel what you are feeling. It’s all part of the healing process.
So be like the lotus. Thrive. Grow. Evolve!
